Are you a Hopper?

What, or Who, is a Hopper you ask

A perfect example – Taylor Swift.  A Hopper is someone who goes from relationship to relationship without a break.  They love love, but they have a hard time holding onto it.  They move from relationship to relationship without missing a beat, but never find what they are looking for. Oftentimes the relationships are mirror images of each other – same situation, different guy.

Being a Hopper isn’t shameful. Hey, I get it! I love to be in love too.  But the issue arises when you don’t take the time out to heal and get rid of the excess baggage from the last relationship. When you don’t take that time, the issues can reflect on the new relationship, especially if you date the same “guy” over and over.

It’s important to get to know you. Take the time to reflect on what worked and what didn’t work in that relationship. What made you happy?  What made you want to scream?  What made you feel lonely? It’s not selfish – it’s setting you up to get what you really want from a partnership.

So, are you a Hopper?  Here’s a few signs that you just might be a Hopper:

  • You hate being single – The idea of being alone makes you start to have an anxiety attack.
  • You are afraid of commitment – When things start going well, you start freaking out, break up, and move on to the next only to repeat the cycle.
  • You are afraid of fights – Meaning, as soon as things start to get a bit rocky, you check out.
  • You want what you want and don’t compromise – Listen, relationships are 100-100. You have to be happy, but so do they.  If you want to get your way 100% of the time, maybe you need to be alone for a while, or you haven’t found the right person.
  • You don’t know what you want – Maybe you want a jock. No, how about a hipster. Oh no…how about a blue color guy…maybe a rich guy…and the list goes on and on.  It’s ok to experiment and figure out your ideal guy, but take a break in between to see what worked and what didn’t.

Stay in a bad relationship – If you would rather be in a bad or destructive relationship than be alone that is a sure sign that you need to work on your own issues before hopping into the next relationship.